Getting Ginyu – Killing Fat Softly (Again)

So the time has come again for me to start dieting – or, more precisely, sticking to the half-hearted, part time diet I’ve been ‘on’ for the last six months. New year’s is a good enough time to start, although I expect the gym’ll be packed. However I need to start now, and start hard, because in May my brother’s and I are going to Comicon as the Ginyu Force from Dragon Ball Z. And as with nearly every character in that franchise, they are composed of roughly 94% muscle mass.


[The remainder is 0.8% basic synapse and core organs, 5.2% quasi-stylish dance moves]

I am going as Recoombe (red hair) and have some small steps to make to match his physique. Previously the greatest obstacle I thought I’d have to this group costume was not, in fact, getting in the same physical condition as my character but getting someone to play Guldo – the little toad dude with four eyes – but since my flatmate agreed to it while hungover and waiting in line for KFC on New Year’s Day, I guess I’ve not excuse but to start getting in shape!

Having made a lucky escape by having to give up Captain Ginyu and no longer having to wear full body paint my costume is now one part finding affordable Saiyan-like armour and five parts working out intensely. This is not to say I might not opt to be Burter, or try to swap back to Ginyu, as an excuse to also wear full body paint, but currently that’s on the back burner. How am I going to achieve the Herculean proportions required in five short months?

Short answer is that I’m not. Sad but true, but that doesn’t mean I can’t try. I sincerely doubt that on my time and money budgets I can grow half a foot and quadruple my muscle mass while destroying every ounce of excess fat on my body. So instead I’m just going to commit to doing the best I can and upping my work out game month on month. For January this means the below:

  • Walking 2 miles a day.
  • Running 4 miles a day.
  • Spending 3 hours a week in the gym.
  • Doing 15 press-ups, 15 sit-ups, 30 squats, a 30 second plank and 60 star jumps twice a day.

This is not going to grant me a demi-god physique by May, but it is going to hopefully set up a routine which I can then extend and build on for the subsequent months. Why don’t I just run six miles a day? Time – I can walk 2 miles at lunch pretty easily but running it would certainly give me a sweat, and the area’s pretty dark after sunset this time of year. I can run near where I live with decent street lighting. I’m going to try and exclude the required running from the time I spend in the gym to maximise my gains there. We’ll see how it goes.

Food wise I’m giving up cheese (once I’ve eaten all of what’s left in my fridge) and bread almost entirely, limiting myself to the bare minimum of either. Wraps are going to be about the limit of what I’m allowed. Potatoes are also getting kicked off the plate again in all forms except on special occasions when they’re specially prepared – so no chips or fries or wedges under any but the most desperate circumstances. Take away is also going to be off the menu, as are microwave meals for calorie and nutritional reasons. I’ve started doing a lot of my own cooking anyway, but I’m going to decrease the amount of nugget-like things I include in it. The meat element is (debatably) fine (depending on source) but the breaded or battered element is not good.

I’ve got back into MyFitnessPal as of this week and hope to keep myself focused on my dietary and exercise concerns with it, helping build the routine and habits. I have already failed this week in my mediocre exercise goals but more on that next entry – for now just know that it wasn’t a complete failure, and that means I had some success. Having to enter everything on MyFitnessPal is somewhat annoying and a little gruelling, but I’ve managed to do it every day (or finish it the next one if necessary). At least I’ve found out that a lot of the meals I cook myself are pretty healthy which is good – and I’ve been getting a lot of compliments about them too, which is even better. My biggest obstacle for eating is portion control, but more on that next time as well!

So lots to look forward to, if you’re vaguely interested about my new attempt at killing fat softly. Ideally it’ll work as well as last time and I’ll get a blog up three in every four weeks. Trials and tribulations await, and we’ll see how a fairly lazy suburban gamer can transform himself from a civilian extra to overly-hyped and under-impressive anime minor villain in stature and fitness.


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